The Gods Are Tormenting Me

Why is it at night,
I remember:
Back in the days when I used to fight,
Uncontrollable was I.
I remember all of the bad times,
And none of the good.
Nothing is as it was.
Everything that felt so right,
Is now remembered as way wrong.
They were never my friends.
He was never mine.
I never belonged there.
Why in our reckless youths
Do we assume we know so much,
When we know nothing,
And feel it all?
I know now the past that torments me,
Was supposed to be.
The Gods put me there to teach me,
And all I learned
Was eternal torment.

All of my mistakes
Plague my conscious mind.
The memories ring in my eyes
More times than I can bear,
My ears are filled
With the voices of those long since past
From my life.
The Gods are punishing me,
For what, I do not know.
I am only nineteen,
But my past haunts my future.
My life is all but ruined.
It will never be the same.
Too many things have happened,
For me to ever be the same.
Anyone who knows me,
Will always agree,
My life is screwed up,
As it will always be.

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