The Primitive Concept Of Death

I sense you next to me,
Though you are not there.
I feel your arms surround me,
But there is only air.
I feel your body pressed to mine,
Lying next to me,
But there is only atmosphere.
The potent mist of time,
Will not stop what I feel for you.
Nor will it ease,
The aching in my delicate heart,
For your companionship.
I love you so much,
But our time together is through.
I'll never be one with you.
I'll never be whole with you.
So I know what I must do.
To live deprived of one's other half,
Is an isolated life.
Bereaved of all life's joys,
And wonders.
Walking in a cloud of blackness,
Solitary, fearing each step you take.
Afraid that you're going to fall.
Fall into a bottomless whole in the earth,
That will eventually,
Drop you into a starry sky,
And a compressed atmosphere.
I can't live like that.
I can't live without you.
My question is,
"What to do?"
I have only one choice,
But it's not a pleasant one.
I don't revel in the idea,
Of my only release.
The release of death.
A trivial thing,
Not unlike the release of sexual frustration.
They are the same,
In their natures.
They release you of anxieties,
Fears, of your complete mine,
In the instant they happen.
The primitive concept of death,
Plagues my mind now.
I'll live still,
In the higher dimension of consciousness.
The higher plane of the world.
The realm of the undead.
Where all "dead" people gather together.
They will be my consoling heart,
As I mourn for what I've left behind.
And maybe someday,
We'll see each other,
In that higher dimension.
Possibly there,
We will be able,
To treat each other,
As separate parts of our same spirit.
And combine into one.
Yes, I think,
The primitive concept of death,
Is on my mind.
And when I take my life,
It will no longer plague me.
Only you will plague me then.
When I can't be with you.
When I can't touch you.
I'll still feel you next to me,
Even as I fly through the air.
You'll still be with me,
Even as I explore my new consciousness,
My new dimension.
You'll never leave me,
Because I'll never let go.
I'll never let go,
Of all of the memories I have.
The times we shared.
The places we went.
The fun we had.
I'll never let go,
Of my never ending serenity with you.
And, I'll never let go,
Of our love.
When I see you again,
You shall know these things.
But until then,
Your mind will wonder,
"Why I ever did this to myself,
In the first place?"
But you know what,
It's none of your god damn business.
I felt like it.
So there.
Ha Ha Ha!
Kiss my ass,
You son of a Bitch!
You're a cold,
Heartless, non-feeling,
Sorry assed bastard!
And I was wrong,
To ever think myself in love with you!
I killed myself for nothing!
When I see you again,
I'll kill you a second time.
You're cold, cruel.
I don't deserve it,
And you never deserved me!
Good Bye
Good Riddens!

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